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Tom Fielding: I don’t like myself
December 13, 2013
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I  am what I am but don’t like it. I am miserable because I had no role in how I look. The first experience that led to my misery is about a night in a European city many years ago. This is how it went: My friend and I had finished dinner in a restaurant and decided to walk up to the bus stand, which was little less than two kilometres from the restaurant.

Well, we weren’t drunk or something. From the opposite side we saw a gentleman coming towards us. But to our amazement he suddenly changed the road on which we were walking. It was more than obvious why he changed lanes. The incident hasn’t left me even after 20 years. The second experience was when I was invited to a party in that town. My friend and I walked in to a welcome by the host. In less than two hours the room was full. But our table had just the two of us. All the others were huddled up together. However, we finished our drinks and left with an impression that went up to shape my thinking. I am not a racist, but what difference does it make because I have been living with the horrible fear of once again seeing a fellow pedestrian change lanes.

I keep reading about abuses but I always say that night I hadn’t done any wrong and even then my table was ignored. Mandela tried his best. But how could one man do away with a scourge that has been the work of millions?

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