Very often one comes across the term ‘generation gap.’ For the uninitiated or those a tad ignorant of its origin, it means a perceived difference of opinion between the children or youngsters and the elders, particularly parents, on issues that concern the young. ‘Helicopter parents,’ or parents who keep tabs on every aspect of their child’s life, frequently lock horns with their wards over issues such as studies, time spent on the internet or mobile phone, or their peers, etc.
The children, who need some personal space, resent such interference. They issue the ‘I, Me, Myself’ clarion call. They would like to be independent because do not understand that the parents are doing what they are doing for their good. They want them to be safe, not suffer for some reckless act that could have terrible consequences they might regret later.
One sensitive area for parents of teenage girls in particular is their boyfriend. They want to make sure he is the right guy for her, and that he is not leading her up the garden path. If they are on the same page, then it is fine. Otherwise, sparks will fly, as happened with a single father who cancelled his young daughter’s date with her boyfriend because he flatly refused to meet him first.
In a viral post, the father, who had the username Main_Hippo_6627, dwelt at length on the spat he had with his 14-year-old daughter, Victoria. The father, a single parent for 11 years, has one cardinal rule for his daughter: it’s OK whom she goes out with so long as he gets to meet him first.
The father said he just wanted to put a face to the name.
A few days ago, a guy named Vince asked his daughter out for a date. He said it was okay. The hitch came when Victoria told her father that Vince was not comfortable talking to parents.
"The father saw red. He was sore displeased with the fact that Vince ‘actively’ avoided parents and told Victoria that he “could use tonight as practice for talking to parents.”
He put his foot down and told her off, saying that if he was not meeting him, there would be no date. “I got a foot stomp and a ‘that’s not fair’. I told her I wasn’t being overbearing, just wanting to meet this kid,” according to the Independent.
The dad said the date was a no-no and ordered her to return to her room. Needless to say, she created a scene, howling, telling him how much she hated him, then slammed the door of her room shut a few times.
The argument led the father to seek advice on the Internet. The support surged into a flood, he got more than 15,000 ‘upvotes’ and over 2,700 comments praising him for his parental skills. The best remark so far came from a user Lumpy-Caterpillar769: “Grateful dads like you exist.”
The single father said it was very scary she sees nothing wrong with his attitude towards him, adding the boy was in the same grade as her.
One surfer said his teenage daughter was just testing limits, to see how far she could go. He was advised to have a conversation with Victoria about why he was strict about enforcing such rules, and that disobeying was a “bit of a red flag.”
He said if the boy really likes her and respects authority, he will realise why her father is so careful and wants to ensure her safety.
Another person agreed, saying, “She’ll ‘hate’ you now to appreciate you later.”
“Everyone would love to be able to trust strangers, even kids, but we can’t. Unfortunately, we also can’t trust teens to always be good judges of character,” said user JimmyJakeAnders. “You made the right move. Your daughter will probably understand that after time, maybe a lot. Good luck and keep on keeping on!”
For the father, seeking online advice was not such a stupid thing after all. Interestingly, the father shared his problem on the popular Reddit forum with the weird title “Am I The A**hole.”