Celebrity waste is for sale and being sold

I think people have gone crazy when it comes to celebrity memorabilia. It seems that if you’re a well-known person whether in the music industry, acting or reality TV, anything you do or have can become a hot commodity.

I’m reminded of an episode of Seinfeld where one of the leading characters, Elaine, accidentally ate a very expensive cake that her boss had bought at an auction. It seems it was from a royal wedding more than 50 years earlier. Her boss had bought it at an auction for thousands of dollars and had it on display in his office as an artefact. He wasn’t annoyed with her when he discovered she had eaten it and told her that when she becomes ill to the stomach, which was bound to happen given how old the cake was, it was punishment enough for her.

In reality, Royal cake slices from weddings are always being saved by their Royal staff and many have been sold for more than they thought they would. A slice from Charles and Diana’s wedding sold for $200 but one from William and Kate’s wedding sold for $7,500. One butler at the Royal house saved slices from several weddings (Princess Anne, Prince Andrew, Prince William and both of Charles’ weddings) and they collectively sold for $2000. I just don’t understand why anyone would want to spend thousands of their money on a small piece of confectionery that they’ll never eat, even if it is from a Royal wedding.

Cakes are one thing but innerwear really takes the cake, pardon the pun. Did you know that Victoria’s innerwear sold for $14,500? Who’s buying them? Surely these belong in a museum?

Now Elvis has been dead for decades but his sweat ridden towels were always in great demand when he was on stage. He’d get a towel, put it round his neck and then toss it into the audience, and whoever caught it would be elated. I’m sure those towels are very valuable today.

But people collect far worse things than Elvis’ used towels. And what’s even worse about it is that when they try to sell them, there’s always someone ready to pay the asking price. For example, Justin Timberlake left a half-eaten French toast at a restaurant and when someone spotted it, they nabbed and sold it for $1,025.

But there’s famous icky stuff going on sale too.  Scarlett Johannsson, The Black Widow, blew her nose into a tissue and then bagged it. Someone sold it for $5,300! And Britney Spears’ chewing gum sold for $14,000! Lady Gaga accidentally broke one of her fake nails at an event and the broken piece sold for $12,000. And William Shatner’s, aka James T Kirk’s, kidney stone sold for $25,000.

But it would seem that air is also not free when it comes to celebrities. Apparently when Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie attended an event, they supposedly breathed into a jar that was quickly sealed. It sold for $523 but the next is even more ludicrous. A bag full of air from Kanye West’s Yeezuz tour sold for $60,100.

I don’t know what’s going on here and who is actually buying these items. I would certainly condone it if the money from the sale of these absurdities went to charitable causes. I believe that, most often than not, it is not the celebrity doing the selling. It’s often a fan who has come across such items and they sell these items for their own personal benefit. But I’m also pretty sure that these celebrities are aware that their discarded garbage ends up being sold for thousands on eBay. I wonder if they wish they could intervene in the sale and make certain that the proceeds go to good causes. Or perhaps they just chuckle and think that their fans are chumps who will buy anything they excrete, including their carbon dioxide.

I personally think it’s a crime against humanity when nonsense is being traded by people with more income than they can spend. It’s sad when people all over the world are starving; they don’t have enough food, clothing, shelter and something as simple as clean drinking water. Can you imagine what they might think if they learned that Justin Timberlake’s leftover French toast sold for over  $1000 when they probably don’t have flour to make bread? In fact, they probably haven’t even heard of half the celebrities whose waste is being sold for thousands.