McTrump was cute — but facade shouldn’t fool anyone

Fascistic, babyish, menacing that he is, the Donald Trump we saw in the footage of him visiting a McDonald’s came across as... somewhat genuine and relatable. Even if he wore cufflinks while handing out Happy Meals. Donald “aced” the fries, as he might put it, and managed to hand over huge bags of fast food to stunned customers without swearing once. That’s a bigger feat for him than it might sound, now that he’s gotten a bit more uninhibited lately. He didn’t demean anyone or threaten them with vengeful vexatious prosecution as he did after the last election (“Would you like a lawsuit with that?”). Nor did he bring up that “a lot of people” tell him how intelligent he is. He didn’t even do those inane dances he does when he’s run out of things to say.

Dare I say it: “McTrump” was almost... charming. Almost. But, of course, this scene was all a ruse. He did not, as his PR team would have you believe, put in a full shift at the drive-thru in Feasterville (yes, really), Pennsylvania. Rather, he was there for one hour max, in a carefully controlled environment. The proud Americans he served prefer Big Macs and Filet-O-Fish to eating pet dogs and cats or (as per the Trumpian fantasy) wild geese like those nasty illegal immigrants — and so found themselves worthy of Trump’s courtesy. But, nice as he was, he’s fooling no one. Those who choose to believe in Trump — and there are many who do — will also choose to believe that he’s just like they are; kinda relatable. And those who despise him, an equally large group, will dismiss the exercise as a stunt driven by Kamala Harris’ more substantial experience at the sharp end of the fast-food business.

In terms of McDonald’s, after all, the super-sized Trump has spent a lot more time guzzling burgers than flipping them. Despite liking a Big Mac, Trump and the life he has always led are about as far away from the average Pennsylvanian as, let’s say, the human settlement on Mars that Elon Musk is preparing for them to migrate to. Which brings us nicely, like a Musk starship being eased back to base, to the role now being performed by the world’s richest man to get Trump back into the White House. While the McDonald’s appearance is unlikely to shift the vote much in the crucial swing state of Pennsylvania, Musk’s “win a million dollars” lottery might. As a stunt, this is the one that has the capacity to do much more damage — not so much to the outcome in the state and thus the electoral college (a vital 19 votes, which could get the Orange Man over the line of 270 to win), but to the wider integrity of the system — to the notion (and the law) that people shouldn’t be bribed to vote or even to register to vote.

No doubt, the Musk legal team think that it’s all OK, and the Maga folk will say that prosecuting Musk for electoral interference is just another example of these patriots being persecuted by Democrat lawfare. But it’s plainly against the sport of the law, and most likely the letter. The Trump-Musk axis is really unprecedented in the political history of the United States, and perhaps of the world — the two billionaires forming an alliance to form an authoritarian regime, tempered only by the impractical madness of their ideas. It is as if, in an earlier age, Henry Ford, John Pierrepoint Morgan and William Randolph Hearst teamed up to put some earlier Republican protectionist and isolationist in the White House. Musk, with his car business, his vast wealth and his hold on social media (where he is personally and actively working for Trump) is indeed those past business moguls all rolled into one.

At this point, no one knows who will win the election — and even the opinion pollsters have become politicised and polarised. What does seem clearer, however, is that something around half of the US electorate is prepared to vote for the biggest threat to American democracy since the civil war. He already has the Supreme Court in his pocket and unprecedented freedom to use his executive power. If he wins, the civil service will be purged of anyone who isn’t Maga-compliant, and the media will be cowed by Trump and undermined by Musk, whose social media site will be a Maga machine. Indeed, Musk himself looks set to be appointed to the Trump administration with a remit to vandalise the federal government in the way he turned X, formerly Twitter, into a racist, misogynistic hellhole. Sooner or later Trump and his creed of populist nationalism was always going to get lucky, as it did in 2016, just failed to in 2020, and may well do so again, probably with JD Vance inheriting the mantle.

It’s astonishing that the known character of the man, the chaotic experience of the first Trump term and the insurrection on 6 January haven’t permanently disqualified Trump from consideration for any public office, but here we are — with the convicted felon being all folksy at a McDonald’s drive-thru as if it was the most natural thing in the world. It isn’t, of course. But at some point the rest of the world will just have to face up the fact that who the Americans vote for as their leader is rightly their business, and if they want a nutter in charge that’s the way it’s going to be. We have to cope with the fact that America, the shining citadel, is slowly descending into the kind of authoritarian semi-democracy we see in places such as Turkey. We have to accept that votes can be bought in Pennsylvania more openly than they can be in Moldova. Europe, in particular, will need to look to its own resources for its defence and to look after its economic interests. We’re not lovin’ it, though.